A game of SwapShop

[princesswarrior]

Last weekend in true Jaxxy style we had a game of swapping words in tune titles, we swapped Love for Muff and Heart for arse. I will start the ball rolling. You must have the title and the lyrics and change the words were ever they appear.


Muff Don't Live Here Anymore

You abandoned me
Muff don't live here anymore
Just a vacancy
Muff don't live here anymore

When you lived inside of me
There was nothing I could conceive
That you wouldn't do for me
Trouble seemed so far away
You changed that right away, baby

You abandoned me
Muff don't live here anymore
Just a vacancy
Muff don't live here anymore

Muff don't live here anymore
Just emptiness and memories
Of what we had before
You went away
Found another place to stay, another home

You abandoned me
Muff don't live here anymore
Just a vacancy
Muff don't live here anymore

In the windmills of my eyes
Everyone can see the loneliness inside me
Why'd ya have to go away
Don't you know I miss you so and need your Muff

You abandoned me
Muff don't live here anymore
Just a vacancy
Muff don't live here anymore

The Arse Is A Lonely Hunter

She came in lookin' good and lookin' around
She's checkin' out every man in the room right now
Don't go tellin' her about right or wrong
She's been alone way to long

The arse is a lonely hunter
With only one desire
To find some lastin' comfort
In the arms of a muff's fire Driven by a desperate hunger
To the dark of the neon light
Oh the arse is a lonely hunter
When there's no sign of a muff in sight

She hears him say "Hey, can I buy you a drink?"
And sees the pale white circle where he wears his ring
She knows he's dealin' her a dangerous hand
The consequences of a one night stand

The arse is a lonely hunter
With only one desire
To find some lastin' comfort
In the arms of a muff's fire Driven by a desperate hunger
To the dark of the neon light
Oh the arse is a lonely hunter
When there's no sign of a muff in sight

From somewhere deep inside she tells him no
Before she starts to cry she turns to go

The arse is a lonely hunter
With only one desire
To find some lastin' comfort
In the arms of a muff's fire Driven by a desperate hunger
To the dark of the neon light
Oh the arse is a lonely hunter
When there's no sign of a muff in sight

Pw

 

[princesswarrior]

Ok Ok Ok seen as you may find this a little to muffy I will post another here goe's

You muff her
But she muffs him
And he muffs somebody else
Ya just can't win
And so it goes
Till the day you die
This thing they call muff
It's gonna make you cry
I've had the blues
The reds and the pinks
One thing's for sure

Muff stinks
Muff stinks yeah yeah
Muff stinks
Muff stinks yeah yeah
Muff stinks
Muff stinks yeah yeah
Muff stinks
Muff stinks yeah yeah

Two by two and side by side
Muff's gonna find you yes it is
Ya just can't hide
You'll hear it call
Your arse will fall
Then muff will fly
It's gone that's all
I don't care what any Casanova thinks
All I can say is
Muff stinks

Muff stinks
Muff stinks yeah yeah
Muff stinks
Muff stinks yeah yeah
Muff stinks
Muff stinks yeah yeah
Muff stinks
Muff stinks yeah yeah

I've been through diamonds
I've been through minks
I've been through it all
Muff stinks

Muff stinks
Muff stinks yeah yeah
Muff stinks
Muff stinks yeah yeah
Muff stinks
Muff stinks yeah yeah
Muff stinks
Muff stinks yeah yeah

Muff stinks

 

[doolz]

jungle bros - il house you


when your in my muff you know whats up

 

[princesswarrior]

Doolz hun, can u c this BLAH BLAH BLAH "Muff Boat"

Lol glad your ok sweety

Pw x

 

['Shabba']

I muff you with all my arse sweeetie!!!!!!!!

Get me a brew, NOW!!!!!!!! or i'll slap u purple.

 

[lizer]

Speaking of swapshop.

Seeing how popular ebay is do u rekon a multicolour swapshop type website would do well?
Like what used to be on telly, i mean people swapping big truck for action men and actually people being stupid enough to actually swap it.

I rekon it would take off,been thinking about it for a while, lol sad git innit.
probs already as webby for it tbh.

 

[Dj M Jaxx]

Muff and marriage

Muff and marriage, muff and marriage
Go together like a horse and carriage
This I tell you brother
You can't have one without the other

Muff and marriage, muff and marriage
It's an institute you can't disparage
Ask the local gentry
And they will say it's elementary

Try, try, try to separate them
It's an illusion
Try, try, try, and you will only come
To this conclusion

Muff and marriage, muff and marriage
Go together like a horse and carriage
Dad was told by mother
You can't have one without the other

 

[Dj M Jaxx]

god i love this game

one more for ya

Muff Is Like An Itching In My Arse
Holland/Dozier/Holland


The muff bug done bit me
Didn't mean for him to get me
Woo, get up in the morning
And I'm filled with desire
No no, I can't stop the fire
Muff is a real live wire
Ooh, it's a burning sensation
Far beyond imagination

Muff is like an itching in my arse
Tearing it all apart
Just an itching in my arse
And, baby, I can't scratch it

Keeps me sighin'
Ooh (keeps me cryin')
Keeps me yearnin'
No, Mama can't help me
No, Daddy can't help me

I've been bit by the muff bug
And I need some information
To help me out this situation
Now, when you're ill, you take a pill
When you're thirsty, drink your fill

Whatcha gonna do
Oh, yeah, when muff gets a hold,
A hold on you?
Muff is like an itching in my arse
And, baby, I can't scratch it

INSTRUMENTAL BRIDGE

Muff is a nagging irritation
Causing my arse complication
Muff is a growing infection
And I don't know the correction
Got me rockin' and a-reelin'
And I can't shake the feelin'

Muff is like an itching in my arse
Tearing it all apart
Just an itching in my arse
And, baby, I can't scratch it

Keeps me sighin'
Ooh (keeps me cryin')
Keeps me yearnin'
Keeps me burnin'
Keeps me tossin'
Keeps me turnin'
Keeps me yearnin'
(Keeps me burnin')

I've been bit by the muff bug
And I need some information

 

[princesswarrior]

L-O-V-E (Nat King Cole)

L is for the way you look at me
O is for the only one I see
V is very, very extraordinary
E is even more than anyone that you can adore

Muff is all that I can give to you
Muff is more than just a game for two
Two in muff can make it
Take my arse and please don't break it
Muff was made for me and you


L is for the way you look at me
O is for the only one I see
V is very, very extraordinary
E is even more than anyone that you can adore

Muff is all that I can give to you
Muff is more than just a game for two
Two in muff can make it
Take my arse and please don't break it
Muff was made for me and you
Muff was made for me and you
Muff was made for me and you



Pw x

 

[Joker Jen]

SOMEONE'S GOT A HOLD OF MY ARSE (Bob Dylan)



They say "Drink and be merry,

Take the bull by the horns."

I keep seeing visions of you, a lily among thorns

Everything looks a little far away to me



Gettin' harder and harder to recognize the trap

Too much information about nothin'

Too much educated rap

It's just like you told me, just like you said it would be



The moon rising like wildfire

I feel the breath of a skunk

Something I got to do tonight

You go inside and stay warm



Someone's got a hold of my arse

Someone's got a hold of my arse

Someone's got a hold of my arse

You-

Yeah, you got a hold of my arse



Just got back from a city of powder blue skies

Everybody thinks with their stomach

There's plenty of spies

Every street is crooked, they just wind around till they disappear



Madame Butterfly, she lulls me to sleep

Like an ancient river

So wide and deep

She said, "Be easy, baby, ain't nothin' worth stealin' here"



You're the one I've been waitin' for

You're the one I desire

But you must first realize

I'm not another man for hire



Someone's got a hold of my arse

Someone's got a hold of my arse

Someone's got a hold of my arse

You, you, you, you

Yeah, you got a hold of my arse



I hear the hot-blooded singer

On the bandstand croon

September song, Memphis in June

While they're beating the devil out of a guy who's wearing a flaming

red wig



I been to Babylon

I gotta confess

I can still hear that voice crying in the wilderness

What looks large from a distance, close up is never that big

Never could learn to drink that blood and call it wine

Never could learn to look at your face and call it mine.



Someone's got a hold of my arse

Someone's got a hold of my arse

Someone's got a hold of my arse

You-

Yeah, you got a hold of my arse

 

[doolz]

lionel ritchie - endless muff

My muff, there's only you in my life,
The only thing that's right.
My first muff, you're every breath that I take,
You're every step I make.
And I, I want to share, all my muff with you,
No one else will do.
And your eyes, they tell me how much you care.
Oh yes, you will always be, my endless muff.

Two hearts, two hearts that beat as one.
Our lives have just begun.
Forever, I'll hold you close in my arms,
I can't resist your charm.
My muff, I'll be a fool, for you I'm sure,
You know I don't mind.
Cause you, you mean the world to me.
Oh, I know I've found in you, my endless muff. And muff, I'll be that fool, for you, I'm sure.
You know I don't mind.
And yes, you'll be the only one.
Cause no one can deny,
This muff I have its fine.
I'll give it all to you,
My muff, my muff, my endless muff.

 

[Joker Jen]

Muff Is written by Jaxxy, Joker, Shabba & Princesswarrior!!


Muff is a feeling
Sometimes a feeling of joy
It's past from a man to a women
And shared between a girl and a boy

Muff can bring you happiness
Muff can cause you pain
Muff can touch you to the centre of your arse
And pump happines from your brain

The world is always changing
Nothing stays the same
Our styles will change
Our minds evolve
But our muff will still remain

One day you will find it
It will suddenly come to you
It will attack the very centre of your arse
And then you will know what muff is too!!

 

[jenwah]

what??!!!!

i also love this game and can think of a fair few, only thing is, i cant b arsed writin all of the wors out or searchin for them on the net!
cause i'm lazy like that!

but....here is a couple of titles

"we've got a freaky kind of muff" (dunno who by)
"this old arse of mine, been broke a thousand times" (also dunno who by)
"my muff is ur muff and ur muff is my muff" (thats by erm, Gabrielle maybe??)
"muffing u, is easy cause ur beautiful" (erm, some random old singer LOL)

there were so many of them bein thrown about at dannsters LOL it went on for bout 2 hours!

 

[Saysay]

Is this Muff? By Bob Marley!

I wanna muff you and treat you right
I wanna muff you every day and every night
We'll be together with a roof right over our heads
We'll share the shelter of my single bed
We'll share the same room, Jah provide the bread

Is this muff, is this muff
Is this muff, is this muff that I'm feelin'? rofl: )
(Repeat)

I wanna know, wanna know, wanna know now
I got to know, got to know, got to know now

I, I'm willing and able
So I throw my cards on your table
I wanna muff you
I wanna muff and treat you right
I wanna muff you every day and every night
We'll be together with a roof right over our heads
We'll share the shelter of my single bed
We'll share the same room, oh, Jah provide the bread

 

[Shooms]

The chorus from my all time fave:- Frankie Goes to Hollywood - The power of muff


The power of muff
A fart from above
Cleaning my bowels
Flame on burn desire
Muff with tongues of fire
Purge the soul
Make muff your goal

everyone get your lighters in the air

 

[Dj M Jaxx]

The chorus from my all time fave:- Frankie Goes to Hollywood - The power of muff


The power of muff
A fart from above
Cleaning my bowels
Flame on burn desire
Muff with tongues of fire
Purge the soul
Make muff your goal

everyone get your lighters in the air

Foooooooookin ell m8.....that is well funny

 

[northern minx]

i have honestly pissed mesel laughing at this thread! an absolute classic! well done peeps!

think i may just hav to go for a ratch for some muffing arses now! lol

 

[northern minx]

i wana know wot muff is..

I gotta take a little time
A little time to think things over
I better read between the lines
In case I need it when I’m older

Now this mountain I must climb
Feels like a world upon my shoulders
I through the clouds I see muff shine
It keeps me warm as life grows colder

In my life there’s been arseache and pain
I don’t know if I can face it again
Can’t stop now, I’ve traveled so far
To change this lonely life

I wanna know what muff is
I want you to show me
I wanna feel what muff is
I know you can show me

I’m gonna take a little time
A little time to look around me
I’ve got nowhere left to hide
It looks like muff has finally found me

In my life there’s been arseache and pain
I don’t know if I can face it again
I can’t stop now, I’ve traveled so far
To change this lonely life

I wanna know what muff is
I want you to show me
I wanna feel what muff is
I know you can show me

I wanna know what muff is
I want you to show me
And I wanna feel, I want to feel what muff is
And I know, I know you can show me

Let’s talk about muff
I wanna know what muff is, the muff that you feel inside
I want you to show me, and I’m feeling so much muff
I wanna feel what muff is, no, you just cannot hide
I know you can show me, yeah

I wanna know what muff is, let’s talk about muff
I want you to show me, I wanna feel it too
I wanna feel what muff is, I want to feel it too
And I know and I know, I know you can show me
Show me muff is real, yeah
I wanna know what muff is...

pmsl!!!