Suicide.

[Amelie]

I know this is a delicate subject, but i just had a phone call from a friend who told me that a girl we used to go to college with many years ago killed herself yesterday, she had boyfriend problems and was recently made redundant.

I don't know how i feel about suicide, i find it totally devastating that anyone could feel so low that ending their life is better than staying alive.

I only know of one good friend who did this, i know his reasons where that he felt he had let his family down terribly with his heroin addiction, and that he hated what he had become and could see no other way. His family were naturally devastaed, but they felt that he had let them down further by ending it that way.

Many view suicide as an act of weakness, but i know that i would never have the courage (for want of a better word) to do that, i just would like to hear what others think. Is it really weakness? I mean do we not have the right to decide if we want to continue with our being?

For those who have afterlife beliefs, what happens to you when you do this?

I hope that this will not offend anyone, if so let me know and i will delete, and please if you are to respond treat it with the respect it deserves.

Cheers,

Amelie.

 

[Bubbles]

I once wrote a letter to my mum when i was 12 saying i was goin to kill myself over somthin stupid and then hid it in my bedroom and to this day she still has this letter i mean i would ov never ov done it im too much ov a wimp to do sumthing big like that.And i love my life too much and i was very young at the time but when she brings it up i fell so ashamed and stupid that i could ov done that

A girl at work cousin comitted suicide last year he jumped off a high bridge in manc cos he was in so much debt with drugs

I have never met anyone close to me that has done it

 

[cam]

You have to be of both week minded to not be able to cope and strong minded to go through with it, either way if your both the above your heads fucked!

I couldnt do it veiwing life the way I do at the moment but things change, yuor percetions of life change, if everyone that ever ment anything to me died all at once by someone say murdering them and I got the chance to kill the person who did it but then got caught red handed and was looking at spending the rest of my shitty days banged up for murder, I could contemplate it and probably go through with it.

I still think its a weak way to get out of a bad situation but each to there own

I also think jumping infront of trains and shit is bang out of order, werll fucks up the poor train drivers

 

[northern minx]

a subject close to my heart, and one i have never got over, and perhaps never will

even tho i have a great faith and believe in reincarnation etc, i still find the intolerable pain of loosing my bro sometimes unbearable, too many unanswered questions

anyhows amelie, hope yr ok chic luv n hugs xx

 

[blue jammer]

I used to think it was somewhat of a weak/selfish thing to do.

After someone who was going through a really bad time a few years ago attempted suicide (very badly) I began to realise, sometimes it isn't really weak at all. People can get themselves so worked up, and convince themselves that it's the right thing to do, or rather, the only thing to do.

When they are that far gone, there's little that will actually stop them.

What I found more distressing about it, was their inability to have talked things over with friends and family, before it got to a stage where they'd gone too far.

I think thesedays, people can feel so isolated in everyday life, they'll not talk to people for a fear of 'mithering them with problems'.

Sorry to hear about the loss, somehow when it's suicide, it's harder to accept than if it's natural causes or an accident.

 

[Sully]

sorry to hear that minxy. i did have some opinions myself, but until you've been in that desperate a situation i suppose no one's really sure what these people go through.

 

[RetroAndy]

A subject that has nearly affected me this one. My thoughts are that i feel that some people are just crying out for help and i suspect that some that actually go ahead with it never actually wanted it but sometimes the help comes too late. Its an awful thought that someone close to ya felt they had to do this and i hope i never have to go through it again. Or anyone else for that matter.

Andy

 

[sirius]

Although I personally havent seriously thought about it to such a realistic extent, I must admit there has been times when I think I would be better off dead, but then I manage to regain sense and know Im just being moronic and selfish to my parents and brother. I have a good life, I know that. Ive wondered a few times how the best way to do it is though to be honest, but thats a very long while ago now.

I think once somebody has been submerged in a pit of depression for a relatively long period of time, it can get easy to talk yourself into it and possibly convince yourself its the only option, and you hurt so much, your thoughts entrap every second of your life, every reflection and scenario of your past, the current state things are in, the lack of vision of a future and apparent worthlessness to fellow humans etc banging around and around your head louder and louder - you can understand how they want that to all end to some extent cant you?

One of my teachers commited suicide in town, jumped off the buss station roof. It was down to his so called newfound 'love of his life' moving into his house, then dealing drugs and then seeing her ex husband behind his back and his threats to expose his house as a drug centre to the school - even though he wasnt involved. I think they made his life hell, taking over, moving into his house against his will etc.......all that ontop of being used and ripped off after so many years of lonlyness he just couldnt take anymore.

I think everybody has the right to decide, Im not sure if its a weakness or not though. Its definately detremental to families and something you never really rocover from I would have thought. I like to think everythings fixable, and those who kill themselves may have led a happy life if they had managed to pull through a hard time. But living a life of pure misery is not a good prospect I suppose.


If there is an afterlife, thats just going to be an added bonus in my book, a special treat if you like depending which way you go! lol. I think we just cease to exist myself and the whole idea of an afterlife is to somehow cushion the blow to those still living......however, I can still find it in me to believe in a great creator and that a heaven exists. Im sat on the fence a bit I suppose. I hope there is one, and I hope people I know have gone there or are going to go there, myself included.


I have never been close to somebody who has done it, and I think I could be seriously traumatised for the rest of my days if it did happen. I feel for those who has lost somebody this way as its tough not only for the loss of a loved one, but also that there are so many questions unanswered and sometimes a total lack of undertanding what was even wrong in thier minds/thoughts. I cant really even imagine what its like.


Sirius.

 

[glazzy]

i'm not sure i could view it as a weakness because you'd have to have some bottle to go through with it, but i wouldn't ever want to feel what people who consider committing suicide must feel to actually think seriously about it.

but on the other hand i can understand that a persons family would feel let down, because no matter what i believe that they will always think there could have been a way to help sort problems out...

a few years ago i saw a friend from school as i was on my way out the shop and he was on his way in, he had his fishing gear with him and i remember thinking as soon as i saw him that he looked terrible, we said hiya as i rushed past him and it wasn't till i'd got in the car i thought he looked like he wanted to talk...i felt quite bad cos i was in a rush. the next week in the paper there was a little article saying he had threw himslef off the bridge in front of a train because he had fell out with his girlfriend, i'm not saying i could have helped in any way atall but i still feel guilty for not stopping and talking to him. I always think of his younger brother and his mum and how they must be coping without him, he loved his younger brother and mum to bits, they were really close and i know it will have torn them apart.

jayne x

 

[piratepete]

makes me feel sad for the person

i think suicide is such a pointless way to solve problems .and some pple use it instead of solving there problems leaving pure mess behind .i agree with cam it isnt fair on train drivers and such like it fecks with there heads.

i once had a woman jump out on me i didnt hit her i missed just but she threw herself on my bonnet and asked me to run her over i managed to get outy of her way she stayed in the road as i drove off ..

ive thought about suicide at a low point i had a few years ago crap was propper crap i had just got out of hospital after a op was skint with being off work due to accident had neighbours waking me up at stupid times in the night,my dog getting poisened ,someone trying to kill me by messing with my brakes,stabbing tyres,breaking into my car,undoing wheel nuts, blocking my drains with tin cans and coat hangers it was enuf to send me on one propper, went skitz for a while. till one day i just woke up to it and said get fecked who cares so feckin what you aint winning like that an started to get me head sorted went to see doctor and was refered to a cpn she was sound an helped me sort my head out .

lookin back at it now i can understand why i felt like i did so much stuff had gone wrong all at once added with the stress i was encountering everyday ( i couldnt even get my pants off without help with my arm in plaster ) all my family live far away ,the ones who dont were away on holiday i had no one i felt i could turn to and was 2 ashamed to tell me mates how i felt .

im still on anti depresants an i still have days when im down but i am so glad i never took my life i would of missed out on my lovely daughter my mrs an the new baby when it comes .
as for the stress an stuff im now on the dole so omly have hassle off jsa, my hand works reasonably well but i cant do somethings as good with it now as i once could. i moved with my mrs and left a lot of stress behind at our old house weve had some reet tough times but its getting better .

 

[nathan]

around xmas

I have never been so low. I was walking somewhere with my parents and felt an urge to jump under a bus. I don't think I'd serious entertain the idea unless I'd been feeling awful for a very long time. After all you never know what is round the corner. Right now for example at this precise moment in time and this one here. I can honestly say I have never been happier. It is such a novelty for a lot of close friends cause I normally say 'urge I'm hungover or am getting a cold'. Not me today ma. Top of the f**king world.

 

[Northern Star]

My close friend Michael hung himself in Autumn 2000....and my other friend Adam shot himself in 1990....Both very different yet adorable characters however both affected by the nature of the world......We have all....each and every one of us ......an inbuilt defence mechanism....which is stronger in sum than in others...we are all different....let us not judge the actions of others...for we all have our reasons for the way we act...regardless of how trivial or serious that action may be......i feel 'as human beings' we have many sides to our personalities that may never be discovered.....as they are locked deep deep down in our subconcious mind.....only when a key be discovered to unlock it will the personality be real.......the key may be the loss of a boyfriend as was the case amelie with your friend.....or the death of a loved one.....as in the case of my friend adam...but we all have different keys and different emotions which is why some people feel they would simply no longer feel.....i feel fortunate as yet that i have not yet found such a key.....however i am opening different parts of my personality each day i exist as im sure are you....but i keep an open mind and i fully understand how cruel this world can be. The human mind is a complex thing lets not underestimate its power.....

The world was a better better place with you in it Adam and Michael....

im sure you will bless the place you are at right now.......here in my soul.. for i am truly blessed to have know you both....

 

[northern minx]

My close friend Michael hung himself in Autumn 2000....and my other friend Adam shot himself in 1990....Both very different yet adorable characters however both affected by the nature of the world......We have all....each and every one of us ......an inbuilt defence mechanism....which is stronger in sum than in others...we are all different....let us not judge the actions of others...for we all have our reasons for the way we act...regardless of how trivial or serious that action may be......i feel 'as human beings' we have many sides to our personalities that may never be discovered.....as they are locked deep deep down in our subconcious mind.....only when a key be discovered to unlock it will the personality be real.......the key may be the loss of a boyfriend as was the case amelie with your friend.....or the death of a loved one.....as in the case of my friend adam...but we all have different keys and different emotions which is why some people feel they would simply no longer feel.....i feel fortunate as yet that i have not yet found such a key.....however i am opening different parts of my personality each day i exist as im sure are you....but i keep an open mind and i fully understand how cruel this world can be. The human mind is a complex thing lets not underestimate its power.....

The world was a better better place with you in it Adam and Michael....

im sure you will bless the place you are at right now.......here in my soul.. for i am truly blessed to have know you both....

u hav just made me cry... such heartfelt touching words that are so filled with love

so so beautiful

 

[walshy]

I think it takes some doing to take your own life! I've been to the bottom of life via depression and I know how it gets. IMO it takes some bottle to do it, and I could never do it. It must be a massive decision to do it and some think it is on the spur of the moment. Not the case I think, there must be an underlying factor that pushes people in that direction. It's a sad fact that it happens and there must be more help out there for people in this situation.
It's a major killer in teenage lads stats say. So what is being done to help?

 

[DeeDee]

Its not weakness, a very close member of my family hung himself in 1996 he was only 27, and he was one of the most life-loving, bubbly, funny and not to mention tough people i ever knew, he was my hero whilst we were growing up and still is. His life changed forever when he came back from the gulf war, i dont know your veiws on gulf war syndrome but take it from me he was seriously messed up when he came back. He then started his own buisness that ran into money troubles and tried to get himself out of it by borrowing and then just got further into debt, to cut a long story short he ended up getting raided by the fuzz who found copious amounts of class a's(just pills no smack or ewt!)in his possesion that he was shifting about to cure his money troubles, and ended up getting a few years in strangeways.His marriage had broken down and his new girlfreind started to mess about with one of his mates whilst he was inside. Now all this usually would not have been enough to tip him over the edge, in fact a few weeks before he went down i saw him in the pier, he was his usual happy go lucky self and when we talked about him going down he said" ill just do me time and get on with it" in fact he expected longer than he got. His head was seriously messed up with the gulf war, he had been getting treatment at a place in wales for gulf war veterans and even doctors called at his trial recommended that he should be placed in a hospital. He used to go missing and his dad used to find him curled up in ball in the middle of a field somewhere, and he was having horrible flashbacks of clearing the Basra road, were he had to pull childrens charred remains from the shells of cars. Anyway the result was that he took his own life alone in his cell on the 7th may 1996. He wasnt weak, but i know that he wasnt in his right mind. Who knows what his final thoughts were, but its really hard to imagine the despair you have to feel to take that step. i know i havent got the bollocks.

 

[Amelie]

Its not weakness, a very close member of my family hung himself in 1996 he was only 27, and he was one of the most life-loving, bubbly, funny and not to mention tough people i ever knew, he was my hero whilst we were growing up and still is. His life changed forever when he came back from the gulf war, i dont know your veiws on gulf war syndrome but take it from me he was seriously messed up when he came back. He then started his own buisness that ran into money troubles and tried to get himself out of it by borrowing and then just got further into debt, to cut a long story short he ended up getting raided by the fuzz who found copious amounts of class a's(just pills no smack or ewt!)in his possesion that he was shifting about to cure his money troubles, and ended up getting a few years in strangeways.His marriage had broken down and his new girlfreind started to mess about with one of his mates whilst he was inside. Now all this usually would not have been enough to tip him over the edge, in fact a few weeks before he went down i saw him in the pier, he was his usual happy go lucky self and when we talked about him going down he said" ill just do me time and get on with it" in fact he expected longer than he got. His head was seriously messed up with the gulf war, he had been getting treatment at a place in wales for gulf war veterans and even doctors called at his trial recommended that he should be placed in a hospital. He used to go missing and his dad used to find him curled up in ball in the middle of a field somewhere, and he was having horrible flashbacks of clearing the Basra road, were he had to pull childrens charred remains from the shells of cars. Anyway the result was that he took his own life alone in his cell on the 7th may 1996. He wasnt weak, but i know that he wasnt in his right mind. Who knows what his final thoughts were, but its really hard to imagine the despair you have to feel to take that step. i know i havent got the bollocks.

Yeah the friend i had was in the army, he too could not cope with the aftermath of the Gulf war, he had a friend who hung himself whilst out there. Maybe be there are things that you should not subject teenagers too, i appreciate that when you sign up you should consider this, but my friend was only 19 and it scarred him for the rest of his short life.