OSA members limerick (keep it going)

[Barrie Jay]

I know a bird called Northern Star
Went to the pub, forgot her bra
When she ordered her favourite tipple
The blokes all cheered
As they could see her pert nipples

 

[ilovepiano]

There is a bloke on here we call Bod
Who thinks he is such a bright sod
Disrespecting his elders by calling them old
Well at least I am not going completely bald
It is also ironic that in taking the piss
He spells the word grammar incorrectly
I shall Tim about this

Tim read this while having his tea
And he laughed so hard that he peed
He rolled on the floor
Banged his head on the door
And gave up on his rhyme coz he's got work to do

 

[Barrie Jay]

Head of the grammar police is called Tim
He looks quite bright but is rather dim
As a poet he`s shit
And a big lazy git
No ending, no rhyme, what a tit !

 

[leaky]

The Dj called Jiglo is funky phones:
Infact he's a big breakbeat junkie
Under his pillow thers a spatula
Because he's still a batchelor
And the socks on the floor are quite spunky

 

[ilovepiano]

Head of the grammar police is called Tim
He looks bright but is rather dim
As a poet he`s shit
And a big lazy git
No ending, no rhyme, what a tit !

Hahaha! Brilliant!

 

[leaky]

theres a Italo disc jock, called B Jay
he's the master of piano they say
but it doesn't make him randy
nor does the posh brandy
thats why he gave the good stuff away

 

[Jiglo]

Let's not forget Mr Radish
Who's said to have a bit of a fetish
He tickles his bum
With his fingers and thumb
Because a feather is not very laddish

 

[Jiglo]

There's a member not seen much called dannster
Shall I say what he did to his hamster?
He stuck his hand in the wheel
To cop a wee feel
Now he's got a warm willy for the winter

 

[Jiglo]

There's a Del boy on here called Buzz
Wheeling and dealing is what he does?
He deals to his clients
from his Robin Reliant
Whilst on the pursuit by the fuzz

 

[Jiglo]

And who can forget Mr Cutter
Like Mr Arkwright he's got a st.. st.. st.. stutter
But he's an mc you see
so it comes in bloody handy
But watch out he's a bit of a nutter

 

[Jiglo]

The stud of the board is Benny Digital
who's style on the decks is original
Looks dashing in pink
He gives all the boys a wink
Then what he does next is simply unforgivable

 

[Jiglo]

That reminds me of Steadmanscott
Caught looking in the mirror a lot
His arse was a ruin
Like the Rome Coliseum
And wouldn't leave the house if he had a spot

 

[Jiglo]

Let's not forget our T.C.
Says ''Don't you dare post a picture of me''
She ain't ugly or owt
But she'd give you a clout
Just like she gives to Woody

 

[Jiglo]

Does anyone remember 'shabba'?
She puts the 'doo' after 'shabba dabba'
Shooms former muse
Put she could pick and could choose
So she chose to go somewhere else.

 

[Jiglo]

One of best of the lot is misstickle
With a minge just like Travis Bickle*
but she's genuine and sound
and give you her last pound
Which is always enough for a bit of slap and tickle

* purely for the limerick

 

[Jiglo]

A very kind member here is simzzzz
Back in the day he was a master of the backspins
Photorealistic art is his game
So watch out for his name
In New York, London and Berlin

 

[Jiglo]

Aww, has everyone given up?

I've enjoyed reading these

 

[Northern Star]

There was an old raver called Martin
He just couldnt stop fartin
his flatulence was loud
Which did him real proud
Out of his ass he could do some beat boxin

 

[Jiglo]

Nice to see the thread is still alive

The king of the board, Elvis on tour
Former resident of Graceland i'm sure
But don't tell his fans
That he's joined us in England
Because he's ours now and of that i'm sure

 

[Jiglo]

The rider of the board u31
Compared to his, your bike weighs a ton
His bike is ali, not steel
He'll grab your bum for a feel
So you pedal for your life so he can't have his fun